The Forgiving Self: The Road from Resentment to Connection
- ISBN-10
- 0307765156
- ISBN-13
- 9780307765154
- Category
- Psychology
- Pages
- 304
- Language
- English
- Published
- 2011-03-23
- Publisher
- Anchor
- Authors
- Robert Karen, Ph.D.
Description
In this fascinating book about our struggle to forgive, psychologist and award-winning author Robert Karen uses movies, people in the news, and sessions from his practice to illuminate the conflict between our wish to repair our relationships on one side and our tendency to see ourselves as victims who want revenge on the other. Why do we harden our hearts, even against those we want to love? Why do we find it so hard to admit being wrong? Why are the worst grudges the ones we hold against ourselves? When we nurse our resentments, Karen says, we are acting from an insecure aspect of the self that harbors unresolved pain from childhood. But we also have a forgiving self which is not compliant or fake, but rather the strongest, most loving part of who we are. Through it, we are able to voice anger without doing damage, to acknowledge our own part in what has gone wrong, to see the flaws in ourselves and others as part of our humanity. Karen demonstrates how we can move beyond our feelings of being wronged without betraying our legitimate anger and need for repair. The forgiving self, when we are able to locate it, brings relief from compulsive self-hatred and bitterness, and allows for a re-emergence of love.
Get the book
Other editions
Similar books
-
Radical Self-Forgiveness: The Direct Path to True Self-Acceptance
By Colin TippingAccording to Colin Tipping, this is because our idea of forgiveness usually requires a victim and a perpetrator—which is impossible when we play both roles at the same time.
-
Handbook of the Psychology of Self-Forgiveness
By Everett L. Worthington, Jr., Michael WenzelTemperament (PLE: Emotion): Early developing personality traits (vol. 3). New York, NY: Psychology Press. Byrne, R. (1995). The thinking ape: Evolutionary origins of human intelligence. New York, NY: Oxford University Press.
-
Forgiving Yourself: Why You Must, How You Can
By Robert H. LauerFilled with stories, examples, and encouragement, the book dispels some common myths about self-forgivenessThe co-authors pave the way for the reality that self-forgiveness is an act of love toward yourself, and they show how you can rid ...
-
Radical Self-Forgiveness: The Direct Path to True Self-Acceptance
By Colin C. TippingAccording to Colin Tipping, this is because our idea of forgiveness usually requires a victim and a perpetrator—which is impossible when we play both roles at the same time.
-
Forgiveness Therapy: An Empirical Guide for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope
By Robert D. Enright, Richard P. FitzgibbonsThis comprehensive volume provides all of the latest research in the roles that anger and forgiveness play in specific emotional disorders and features clinical examples of work with individuals.
-
Forgiving Ourselves: Getting Back Up when We Let Ourselves Down
By Wendy UlrichSUB TITLE:Getting Back Up When We Let Ourselves Down
-
Forgiving Yourself: A Step-By-Step Guide to Making Peace With Your Mistakes and Getting on With Your Life
By Beverly FlaniganOffers a step-by-step plan to help readers overcome guilt and self-blame so that one can move on with their life with a more positive attitude. Original.
-
The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World
By Desmond Tutu, Mpho TutuThe Book of Forgiving is both a touchstone and a tool, offering Tutu's wise advice and showing the way to experience forgiveness. Ultimately, forgiving is the only means we have to heal ourselves and our aching world. How do I forgive?
-
Forgiving What You Can't Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That’s...
By Lysa TerKeurstHave you ever felt stuck in a cycle of unresolved pain, playing offenses over and over in your mind? You know you can't go on like this, but you don't know what to do next. Lysa TerKeurst has wrestled through this journey.
-
The Way of Forgiveness: Letting Go, Easing Stress, and Building Strength
By D. Patrick MillerIn this highly praised work, D. Patrick Miller reveals forgiveness as Sa disciplined and increasingly joyful approach to seeing and being that amounts to a new way of life.